Let not, therefore, but travail therein
till thou feel list. For at the first time when thou dost it, thou findest but
a darkness; and as it were a cloud of unknowing, thou knowest not what, saving
that thou feelest in thy will a naked intent unto God.
This darkness and this cloud is, howsoever thou dost, betwixt thee and thy God, and letteth thee that thou mayest neither see Him clearly by light of understanding in thy reason, nor feel Him in sweetness of love in thine affection. And therefore shape thee to bide in this darkness as long as thou mayest, evermore crying after Him that thou lovest. For if ever thou shalt feel Him or see Him, as it may be here, it behoveth always to be in this cloud in this darkness. And if thou wilt busily travail as I bid thee, I trust in His mercy that thou shalt come thereto.
Well I’m gonna chew on this one for a while
I see. What is he saying? Be in the clouds unknowing because only there
will my naked intent be for God.
That’s right, in front of the creator you
is naked youse got nothing to hide and even if you do try to hide you'll
know soon enough the game is over.
Did I interpret the anonymous mystic
incorrectly? Is he or she referring to
the old testament temple cloud, the shekinah glory kind of cloud that moses
found himself in, I think so, it’s symbolic, it means much and on this Thursday
overcast and drizzly morning in the clean desert clouds are everything, clouds
unknowing is fog in the 21st century. Neither see
him clearly by light of understanding in thy reason. Ah the crisis for the high-octave cognant,
how can I believe if I cannot reason, only accept, blindly in a cloud of
darkness though it behoveth always to be in
this cloud in this darkness, now the word behoveth is
close to our behooves, it behooves me I’m so upset with this vacuum cleaner,
Marge? Ya, I don’t know what he means
now. If you’re in the presence of
shekinah glory why would it behoove anyone to be in it, or is darkness in this
context, suffering? To be present with
the Lord, you are physically absent in body.
No no we can be present with the Lord while
our spirit is in the body, in your daily darkness of suffering, the
prerequisite for mystics I believe, you are with God though you never know it
if you’re a migrant mother of starving freezing babies and I guess a migrant
mother can’t be a mystic though I’d argue for the length of time that woman has
been suffering she’s been a mystic and she’s been in a dark cloud unknowing
you’re damn right she is, when you suffer through no fault of your own you are
in God’s almighty dark cloud unknowing, unknowing if God is listening it seems
unfortunately.
Cloudy it is at noon and two white
helicopters are going back and forth above us.
I was all ready to go out this morning and get a haircut, go to the
bank, airanna airlines, and yet I sit here.
Two weeks from today may I remind you, is the beginning of a short and
necessary holiday. Ha ha. Such patience
you must practice. I tell ya what I
don’t like is having to be dependent on anyone to do all these things.
Rezek washed out the fridge when I gave him
a bottle of spray cleaner I purchased last night and now it sits open and ready
to use. I bought milk and cereal and I
will need to drink the Iranian 3% Fat milk fast if I don’t have electricity.
8.48pm
The man is too ugly to not be offensive and
now watch for copycats. Instant global
recognition. What has the American
Coliseum of the new absurd brought us when the House of Cards is the Republican
party. The media. Politics.
Reality television, we’re all a part of the ugliest show on earth. Well there is a way to tune it out and away,
just unplug.
I just turned down a party offered by one
of the wealthiest men in Kandahar. What
the hell, why didn’t you say yes, it’s a good question what is it about that
upper echelon that makes me hesitate? I
have no clothes on I’m going to bed in five minutes don’t send your driver,
such lies am I becoming a frank underwood lord help us.
It would have been fun. A bunch of men drinking johhny walker and
smoking pretty good hashish. let your
hair down and try to behave as if you’re not mashed. That doesn’t sound like fun.
Instead I listen to silence, actually it’s not
too silent with the fridge on and off and big blue hums in the distance. I ate a bowl of honey bunch and oats with
them strawberries that kind of went mush real quick in the Iranian milk which
was good and cold, look at that clean electrical fridge chilling a box of milk
and a box of orange juice from Spain I better check the expiration date on that
which reminds me the sour cream and chive rice crackers were stale, what a
shame and waste, but my sugar free fudge wafers are still fresh.
Do you remember the last time you raised
your voice? Yes, at a man on the phone
three months ago. That’s pretty good, it
is. I am glad the student body has been
so good to work with. I don’t like
shouting.
calm down with this, uh oh, they’re
marching…
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