bathroom dreams

10:13pm

In the business class this morning I went over how to write a business plan and when I was sure everyone understood the basic format of one I gave them their assignment which was to write one for the new business they would start.  “Imagine, you are your own boss, how would you plan it?”  Earlier a show of hands showed how much everyone would love to have their own business, to be their own man, to be free, even at great risk, to decide their own future. 

Then the student named Angel, who works in the HR, said it is company policy that no employee may plan any work that is in contrast to their employment at Roshan.  In other words, imagining, dreaming about work that is not part of their job description is not permitted and anyone caught doing so would be subject to dismissal.  I was, to say the least, upset and joked everyone would have to dream in their bathroom, dream of being their own boss in the confines of their toilet.  Big laughs, bathroom dreams, they all said in unison. 

Like I did in Kandahar I trumpeted the prospects of the tourism industry, a gold mine for people without education and how long will we wait before I can take a six hour taxi with guide to Bamiyan, I don’t know.  It is frustrating, it is disappointing, and I think I have been way too naïve about this place.

In the evening class I talked about the Afghan ambassador to the US, Hamdullah Mohib and several students had met him, several were friends of his, wow, cool, and they shared his frustration that today’s generation has to fight against this inherited war, the insane and selfish conflict that one student tried to explain was complicated.  Very complicated he said, it goes back to the creation of Pakistan and men.  Men.  I’ve read too much of men who wish war would continue because peace would destabilize, God help us.  Really.

I am as packed as I can be, a couple of t-shirts, socks and so forth, my swimsuit, the most important thing in my bag for three nights in the big shwarma.  I’m actually wondering if I’ll bring my camera, I haven’t taken too many photos of the place the last two times I’ve been there and I know exactly what I’m gonna see and where I’ll go, I’ll have the smart aleck phone.  Ok.  Mr. Leica, take a break.

Two of the students also from the evening class followed me back to the office because I had information about French scholarships and the girls asked if they could take photos of me with them.  You are so kind, sir, please always be our teacher.  So sweet.  Well, I am kind because you are kind, _______and_______.  And that’s true.  If they were pain in the butts, I wouldn’t be kind, but they are kind and if only I could stay another year, what would you need to remain here, God help me, a wife?  A dog?  Freedom to travel in this country?  A wife?  two dogs? 

The next time I visit the blog will be Saturday.  If for any reason the plane crashes or the van we go to the airport in tomorrow is hit by a missile and we’re all incinerated instantly, let it be known I don’t hold any ill will towards God.  So much hatred, so much suffering, God knew today’s media was gonna show us everything, it must disappoint the old fella, it must hurt when people in Allah’s name kill people, but let it be known God has to intervene, He, She, Om, has to because no matter how hard we try we’ll always have war, we’ll always have the poor.  And now that we know so much more, only divine intervention is gonna save us.  So once again, to close, Maranatha and good night.

admire the flowers

“Due to the emergency session of the Afghan parliament being held tomorrow, and the expected and commensurate security protocols, including the closure of Darulaman road, we will lockdown first thing tomorrow morning until further notice is communicated by this office.” 

Monday 25 April, 6:09am

Sometime this morning the President of Afghanistan, Ashraf Ghani will travel to Parliament.  The university is closed and we are in lock-down.  That is we cannot leave the compound for any reason whatsoever.  I’m sure glad I bought food the other day. 

‘Have a nice lock-down’.  I guess if I were an annoying insurgent this could be an opportune time to make some noise. With the main road closed I had to email Roshan and tell them sorry I am in lock-down.  This means Tuesday is for now my only day of classes before I head to the Peninsula, provided I can make it to the airport.  Sure wish I worked for the embassy.  They get helicopter lifts to the international terminal.

Let’s just hope and pray nothing happens.  It’s the least we can ask God to do for this war-weary people, for crying out loud. 

So why did you wake up at five fourteen in the morning I don’t know.  What’s worse I slept terribly, on a day off no less.  I have no plans today but sleep.  There is an article due by the end of the month I should work on and that would be a good thing if I finish it and send it off.  I should prep for tomorrow, that is if there is class tomorrow.  What a joint. 

I think I’ll read.  I’m halfway through the best of American travel writing, perhaps I can pick up advice on reading others who are published. Sigh.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/what-does-afghanistan-need-some-major-rebranding-says-its-32-year-old-ambassador/2016/04/21/2adb3a66-06e3-11e6-a12f-ea5aed7958dc_story.html

75% of the Afghanistan’s population is under the age of 35.  This a good story, a young ambassador indeed who is tired of what previous generations have left him and 75% of the population with.  Come on! Rise up you 75 percent and reclaim your land, demand peace and prosperity, demand an end to cronyism and nepotism, demand your right to live free from fear and want.

I'd get pretty ticked if I were under 35 and learned three quarters of my people have never  known peace.  That is astounding.  And sad.

Do I share the sentiments of others who fall in love with the place?  I wish I could.  I have said over and over how much I have enjoyed the students in my class.  Good people, a sense of humor survives but this ambassador is right, he should be sick and tired of not having the chance to admire the flowers.  No one admires nature, I saw that in Kandahar.  Except maybe for Hanukkah who planted flowers inside the walls of PDI.  May  he one day plant flowers outside the walls.

A year ago yesterday Nepal suffered a terrible earthquake. 

2:11pm

The lockdown has been lifted.  Well?  There it is.  And clouds roll in, rain wasn’t in the forecast but it doesn’t matter does it?  A nice lunch of French toast and a cup of milk tea.  It would be nice to take a nap but I need to review my notes for tomorrow’s classes.  And! And I finished the article and submitted it.  If it is accepted it would be the first piece of academic work I’ll have published.  Wow, at 53 and twenty years of experience, is it any good?  I don’t know, it isn’t bad but but, whatever. Let’s listen to the Moody Blues.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpUVnyKvrWI

9:56pm

Why am I still up?  

move away from the day

6:00pm

Is it ok to get out of bed now?  A clear day and in the evening it’s still chilly and I need long johns and my head wrapped in pashmina.  I haven’t been cold in April since I don’t remember.  On the Arabian Peninsula temps are in the nineties already.  I’ll be diving into those sweaty climates but first I have to get through the next three days and I don’t feel so hot, I don’t know what it is other than the usual downside of medicine from the day before and the traditional spring blues like my throat hurts and I have a headache.  I should look for more grapefruit seed extract on Thursday, the day sort of planned to hang out at the largest mall in the world, it is the largest mall in the world by total area but it is listed in wikipedia as number 19 for reasons I don’t care, really.  I’ll see a movie if there is a movie worth seeing, I’ll tempt myself in the big bookshop, I’ll eat a meal I have been craving for a long time.  Mexican?  Thai?  A real hamburger?  And then I’ll return to my hotel room and if it isn’t too late submerge spirit and body in the rooftop pool.

Actually I got out of bed at the normal routine time of six am and went to the campus at ten because I was invited to sit in on a class whose last day it was, a group from Roshan had finished a three month marketing strategy course, three of the students there are in my morning class and then there was a meal and diplomas were handed out and I fled as soon as I had a chance but before I was taken home I asked the driver to take me to “Finest” the supermarket and I bought Classico sauce, cheerios, some nice Twinings tea, Walker butter rich shortbread cookies, crackers, juice, milk, yogurt, veggies, and a loaf of uncut bread. 

And no I didn’t go out looking for a pharmacy last night.  I’ll look when I return.  I know I won’t find anything in Dubai unless I visit an actual doctor…

9:23pm

Watching late night shows on youtube must have some medicinal value, I know making my student’s laugh has always put tense or nervous students at ease.  So, thirty minutes of Bill Maher and Steven Colbert helped me cough loudly tonight, something I haven’t done since Kandahar.  Thanks, fellas. 

So?  This anniversary of sorts is over and nothing happened, what a fuss you made.  I did get good news first thing in the morning, the fingerprints made it to Sylvanwood Drive, I really didn’t think they’d ever be seen again.  Can I take that as a sign?  No.  A coincidence?  Not on your life.  In truth the fingerprints arrived on the 22^nd not the 23^rd I only heard they made it on the 23^rd, so it is not a coincidence.

Perhaps now you can move away from the day, what good has it done you in the last seven years?  Joseph Campbell says a message was given and I have to live with it and make sense of it and somehow take from it what is good and for the better I want to return to university in September and do something that started long before 4.23.09. 

I'd just like to take a break, ya know?  A long rest, in a hammock, with my favorite books next to me, next to an ocean, or a lake, or in the mountains where the air is pure and clean.  The journey will never end you know that.  I know, I was just kind of hoping I could take a break for a while, ya know?

hoops with the Prince

It is a beautiful Friday morning and in front of me is a wobbly gangling pile of work I have to grade.  Ugh.  Well, let’s get to it, shall we?  In a minute, I have to empty my head of thoughts before I tackle the gangle.

After class yesterday a student told me he was in India a few months ago for medical reasons and his doctor told him every Afghan he has seen suffers from some sort of acute anxiety.  I didn’t ask him what those symptoms might be but I can guess. 

The Afghans I have met are resilient people.  They, the ones I’ve met, endure daily obstacles I cannot simply imagine.  Economic distress, the chance to improve their lives is a fight close to impossible. So many hurdles lay before these people; from the Taliban to their own system of governance to antiquated codes, the constant threat to society is ever present and the tension is an attack on the peace of one’s conscience. 

Before I booked my flight to Dubai next week I talked to the senior travel officer at the university about visiting Bamiyan or Herat or Mazar Al-Sharif, and there were no flights on the days I’ll have off thanks to Mujahedeen Day.  Bamiyan is only six hours by car and it is just too dangerous to drive, such nonsense and such a disappointment I told him.  How in God’s name will peace ever come to this ancient land if ideologies and corruption and social divisions and inequality for women, how can this land ever come to the place where peace is shared by everyone, I don’t know and neither do its citizens.

Anything else?  It’s a full moon today and it’s earth day.  Strange that this day to recognize the planet changes every year.  Seven years ago it was in March.  Anyways, the sun is out and anywhere else I’d be outside soaking it in. 

4:57pm

A year ago I wrote this novena:

http://teshidalak.blogspot.com/2015/04/a-new-novena.html

And it worked, well something happened, something I never expected.  I haven’t used it since then and I don’t know why, my future is as cloudy as a warm spring afternoon in the capital.  Do you have any reason not to go through it?  Lots of little things tax me but they don’t seem too important today.  I’m thinking of going to some pharmacies when it is dark to inquire about more Tramadol which I took the last of this morning after I finished grading my student’s first unit test.  I appreciate the state two of these put me in for right now it is quiet even with a raucous game of volleyball in the next compound and I am calm.

9:42pm

The press conference with the UK prime minister and President Obama just finished and I’m telling ya, America was, is, fortunate to have had this man as their leader for seven years and the next president, whoever she is, and if she chooses Elizabeth Warren as a vice-president, is the only way America is going to save itself from a stretch of calamitous roads we will regret and those who have decried the last eight years are gonna miss a leader with a good heart and whose only interests was peace through policies that were fair and equal. 

Of course we don’t know what the future holds for planet earth.  Tomorrow everything could end, the Lord could come back in the clouds and every eye would see the Blessed Hope with or without Pat Robertson or Wolf Blitzer narrating the day.  But I imagine tomorrow will be just another Saturday, America, the UK, will continue to try and promote peace and equality without religious or political ideologies that only divide and always conclude with unrest, may God-Om-Allah bring us home once and for all.  Maranatha.

A second cup of tea this late may upset a good sleep, a couple of Nyquil horse pills I hope will  get through the night without waking up two or three times and if I could dream, something I haven’t done in such a long time, I pray a dream of playing a game of basketball with the Prince of Peace.  That would be a good way to end anything, wouldn’t it?  

And posting this blog now I see this is the 500th entry on 'How Green is your Valley'.  I started this exercise in August of 2012 and I am glad to have kept it going, it's been a remarkable run. La'Chaim.   

I don't know who these people are.